So, yeah. I like this Friendster thing now that all of my friends are on there and I can see what retarded things they write in their profiles. M�s interest in competitive lawn mowing made me laugh, so I wrote him a testimonial that included the words �tits and ass� and involved me kicking him in the nuts. (What can I say? I�m a classy chick...) I got a shiny, new testimonial from another friend saying that I�ll be the woman my son�s friends will want to biff. Oh so true... If I can prevent the sag, I�ll be a total MILF.

[If you don�t know the acronym, google it. I�m not gonna put a link to anything dirty while typing this up at work.]

Last night I watched my Office Space DVD while eating my fake BBQ dinner (BBQ tofu, green beans, and mashed potatoes). The entire movie makes me giggle, but when talking about the girlfriend doing the boss and that the kid would have hoofs, I can�t help but cackle like a hyena.

The line reminds me of If They Mated... on Conan O�Brien. Then I think about what some of my kids would have looked like had I had kids with my previous boyfriends.

Damn, I�ve dated a homely bunch.

Except you. Yeah, you�re hot. Come chew my clavicle anytime.

(There. That covers my ass if any exes are reading this page...)

I�ve been thinking about boyfriends lately, and I think I�m on the cusp of being okay with getting one of them in the near future. I don�t have a specific one in mind, but I do have some requirements.

Let�s see...

Funny, extroverted, sexy, interesting, well dressed, environmentally conscious, well rounded, fun, witty, suave, outgoing, silly, driven, wild, creative, and healthy -- All that, and smell like dryer sheets too!

Oh wait a sec.

If I�m all that I want, I�ll just stick with what I already know. I�ll take some rechargeable batteries instead, thankyouverymuch.

I think I�m going to write another survey. I�ve got some interesting questions in mind. This time I�ll make it a love-related survey.

How appropriate. It�s Wednesday. Hump day -- He he!

Here's my newest survey!�