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T h e A d v e n t u r e s o f C h i c a g o J o

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Calling 911

2006-07-14� � 11:31 a.m.
Wednesday night I was eating dinner at home when my friend called, suggesting that I should meet her at a nearby bar for a drink. I was still feeling the effects of a hangover from margarita pitchers from the night before (henceforth a weekly event to be called Margarita Tuesdays), but I figured I�d be social and at least meet a few friends out as I sipped on some water.

While outside waiting for my friends to show, I saw a man with a little saw attempting to cut down one of the city trees. I couldn�t believe that this man was back and forth and back and forth without anyone saying anything to him about what he was doing.

Upon second thought, if the man was crazy enough to saw down a tree planted in along the city sidewalk, he likely wouldn�t hesitate to slice off my arm, justifying his actions by saying that my pasty flesh would go well in his freezer. Ya know, right next to his pet canary that�s been dead for going on nine years now...

He�s got a couple homeless people down the way, egging him on. There�s a shopkeeper watching him go at it. The people walking by are completely ignoring what�s going on.

I took out my cell phone and told the non-emergency police about the crazy man, and then I ducked inside before he got his beat-down from the cops.

What really struck me were the pedestrians who ignored what he was doing. If that was Texas, someone would have gone all militia on his ass for defacing public property. Everyone knows the �Don�t Mess with Texas� slogan. Just as famously, everyone knows how crazy Texans are.

I sometimes forget that I live in a big city. Crazy folks, public apathy, and the awareness that no one is ever 100% safe come with the territory. That�s just the way it is.�



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