[cheesy grin]

Today, with my nasty sinus headache, I feel like I look slightly better than monkey poo. However, I�m apparently wrong.

I�m wearing normal work clothes (a wine-colored v-neck with dark grey pants, my knee-high boots -- which you can�t tell are knee-high because of the pants), my hair down, and my glasses. And somehow I�m getting extraordinary responses from my bodacious self. I don�t get it.

On my way to lunch I had one man stop and stare. On the way back I had another greet me and give me the look. When I went downstairs to the pedway, this other man asked if I was available for dating without having said anything else to me.

However odd that may be, I had a funny moment with someone from my own team, a man who has seen me day-in and day-out for the past six months. As I stepped out of the elevator, we were facing each other. I said hello and asked if he was having a good day, he responded with a blank stare along the lines of, �Who are you, and why are you talking with me?�

If you actually know me and see me sometime today, will you please tell me if I look any different? I don�t know what�s up and would like this mystery solved.

My fishtank has taken a turn for the worse, my friends.

For those of you who don�t know, I have a 45 gallon tank in my livingroom. At one point I had about 30 fishies in there, maintaining a good inch-per-gallon ratio.

When I made my move to Chicago, several of the fishies didn�t make it, leaving me with about half of the original load. The tank was quickly set up, and all was well.

Slowly the tank�s number declined, and my five fish were doing well. They were thriving, they were schooling, they were living the best life a fish in captivity could.

However, something went terribly wrong over the weekend, leaving me with three fish as of last night. When I checked on the tank to do another pH test to see if it was once again crashing and needed more baking soda added, there was another floater.

This isn�t the kicker, though. What really got me was that my placo (the more sophisticated name for a sucker fish) was attached to this dead fish, suck-suck-sucking away at his remains.

Ewww. Cannibalistic fish.

That was truly one of the grossest things that I�ve ever seen. Just thought I�d share.

I talked with my brother last night for a good amount of time. I forgot to call him right back, taking advantage of my free nighttime minutes on the cell phone. I apologize up-front to my bill-paying parents for my negligence. My bad. I�ll be more careful when my favorite brother calls to tell me hello from now on.

But, man, my brother is awesome. If you�re an intelligent, witty, and pretty girl, you�d do well to snag him now. That boy�s going somewhere, and it�s bound to be a heckuva ride.

Of course, you will have to get past me first. And believe me when I say that it�s more than just some pull-my-finger lines to get by this big sister.

You know he does the same with my boyfriends. It doesn�t hurt that he�s larger than most of them either. Boy could benchpress a Chevy, so any boyfriend of mine is likely to be smashed if he does me wrong.

Let that be your warning, boys and girls. A smashing from my brother, and poop jokes from me.

I had a particular good-looking, smart-as-a-whip, clever-as-can-be man accompany me to an outing held by my friends, and they�ve begun grilling me to his whereabouts at more recent get-togethers.

To most of them, me bringing a man to an event was a big enough deal -- a testament to their witnessing of my drunken makeout days, no doubt. They noted that I hadn�t said anything about said man previous to his appearance, and I admitted that I was being secretive for fear of questioning.

You know how it is, everyone. (I originally said, �ladies,� but I�m sure you guys get it too.) �How long have you two been together?� and �Where did you meet?� quickly turns into �Are things serious?� and �When are the babies coming?�

Holy cripes, I don�t need any of that.

Don�t be expecting me to smell of baby powder (or baby puke, for that matter) anytime soon.

So there.

ChicagoJo says: I need to work on doing something good for the community

ChicagoJo says: I want to carry the Olympic torch sometime

A Friend says: practice in your gym

A Friend says: bring a broom

ChicagoJo says: No, it's really actually quite heavy

A Friend says: tape a toaster to it

I�ll end on that note. If that kind of IM is what keeps me going through the day, that�s what you get too.

G�nite all. Hope your Monday was a good one.�