(1) Drop everything right now and open a Word document. Start typing up everything that makes you nuts about the boy -- no matter how trivial. This list needs to be saved and added to whenever necessary. Whatever you do, DO NOT EVER DELETE ANYTHING on this list.

This document will serve as a reminder of what a poop-chute of a man he was and how cruddy he made you feel. It�s particularly useful for situations where the ex tries to get some ex-nookie or wants to reestablish a relationship of any sorts with you. There�s no clouding the memories with previous happy thoughts, merely the hard truth in front of you come decision time.

One list of mine had only two bullets. If we were in a place to get back together, he�d receive some consideration. Conversely, another list was two pages. Not. Gonna. Happen. �I want to wear the pants in the relationship,� actually made it onto that list. (What can I say? I like pants!) But it illustrates how many problems were there, even when it�s not as apparent at times.

It�s gonna hurt. It�s gonna make you cry. You�re not gonna like it. But do it anyway.

Simply write down everything you can come up with and file it away for later.

(2) Go get yourself a rebound man. You�ll feel better about it. Let him boost your ego until you can do it on your own.

For god�s sake, don�t choose a friend or sleep with the rebound man. That will only complicate things. It�s also rude since you know that this is only a temporary arrangement and don�t want him to form any unnecessary attachments.

My rebound man from my previous relationship was kept around for a whole two dates. That�s all it took to get me back into my element. It proved to me that I could hold conversation with a stranger for hours on end, was attractive enough to snag a man that looked like him, and was the one with the pants these days.

Luckily for me, he was a wreck of a man and made it easy for me to stop hanging out with him based on his many, many issues.

(3) If you aren�t into using a person to make you feel better about yourself, I highly recommend the drunk make-out.

You can even use the patented-pending Chicago Jo move where you grab him by his shirt collar with an underhand grip, push him against a wall, and as your mouth moves towards his, your left leg goes up to semi-straddle him.

Hot. Very hot.

And when you�re done, don�t get his number. Let it go. Enjoy the moment while it lasts.

(4) Go ahead and get bloody friggin� drunk.

There�s nothing like howling, �What�s wrong with me? Why doesn�t he love me?� while hanging your head out of your friend�s car window, puking pink froth (that�s what cape cods look like coming back up) while driving down the highway.

Make sure you�re with a good enough friend who will pull down your pants when you decide you have to pee (and who will later laugh at the moment she realized you weren�t wearing underwear), hand you the trashcan to continuing emptying your stomach�s contents into while you pee, and make a �cotton condom� on her couch so you don�t accidentally puke on her upholstery.

Plan on calling into work for the next day because you certainly won�t wake up in time to go in.

(5) To get serious for a moment... Limit any destructive behaviors you may exhibit, keep anything in check, set a stop-by date, and strictly abide by it. Don�t let some douche-bag cause any permanent damage to you. In the end, you�re always going to have yourself.

(6) You can always take a different extreme with this though: Let this be your opportunity to get everything you wanted done, done. Start volunteering with that dog-walking group you always wanted to join but never had time to. Learn how to swing dance. Make new friends. Work yourself up to running a 5k for charity. Take up pottery. Write that novel.

Simply, if you�re going to have some extra time, embrace it.

(7) Don�t drunk-dial for an entire month. Just don�t do it. It won�t turn out pretty -- I promise.

(8) Always look your best when you go out.

First off, you�re getting back on the market and never know when you�ll run into someone worth at least a trip to a coffee house for some Sunday afternoon conversation.

Secondly, you need to look your best if you see you-know-who. Make it hurt when you walk by, looking good and knowing it.

When you feel pretty, you look even more radiant. That extra effort goes a long way. Reserve the puffy eyes and shoddy pants for at-home use only.

(9) Get yourself a Hambone. There�s something about a small mammal snuggling you in the middle of the night, petting him as he naps on your lap, and the excited meows when you get home. You provide food, shelter, and the occasional box or paper bag for hiding, and he�ll give you so much in return.

(10) Remember that you�ve got a friend who�s thinking of and worrying about you, and that she�ll do anything she can to help you out.�